Happy New Year.

Here I sit, sweatshirt and stretch pants, comfortable and warm and quiet.
Last night went to a bar with SigOther and Daughter. We had noisemakers and ticklers and all sorts of ribbons and bows and furbelows. We drank comfortably, talked comfortably, and hugged and kissed at midnight.
Now I'm simmering the pork to get it ready for the collards and hoppin john. The smell fills the house.
In spite of the fun of last nite - or maybe because of it - everyone is incommunicado, silent, except me. Me and Sasha, anyway; she missed me last night and wants to cuddle. A 65-lb dog that wants to cuddle is heavy and funny and silly to say the least!
Looking at my dream houses online. Then I went over to the South Dakota forum and did a ripping post for which I got immediate kudos. Nice to talk to people intelligently and in my own language - edumuficated - and have them respond in kind. Before the internet there were so few who understood my language or my meaning. Even the local forums can't reflect any light in their dim tunnels. But I can talk to people from all over the world and have a meeting of the minds. Nice.
This year is going to start off pretty wild, very quickly; but holding to the thought of escaping is helping me keep it together. A dream soon to be fulfilled; or as I told my best friend last week, I'll finally get what I've wanted since I was 14. It's not the dream he has, of course - he's always been on a different course from me and always will be. I no more understand his than he understands mine. But that's not why we are friends, so that's ok. I'll hate to leave him worst of all. Other people in my life have come and gone with barely a ripple, but what we put our minds and hearts into together, when everyone else thought we were crazy, bound us together as inseparably as duct tape. He brought me into his world for awhile, and I hated it but understood it was necessary. Now -not so much. The duct tape is fraying under the constant flow of my need to stop, slow down, take care of what's important to me. So we will peel apart at last; and even though he promises to stay in touch, I know better. But I pretend all the same, because to do otherwise would make him unhappy. And his world does not make me happy. Never has. Never will. It was simply expedient for the time. And the times they are a changin'.